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Sleepy Hollow Episode 5

 Episode 5: “John Doe”

Ichabod lives in the cabin now. He discovers “spackle” and “loofas.” He is inconvenienced by plastic: “What is this impenetrable barrier around this instrument?”



A young boy emerges in Sleepy Hollow, clearly from the past, and, really, Abbie seriously doesn’t believe the boy is from the past despite everything that’s happened? 



The boy speaks Middle English, and Ichabod speaks Middle English because he speaks ALL THE LANGUAGES.



Orlando Jones and Abbie still doubt the boy is from the past and mock Icabod. Um, why?



Abbie’s douche-y ex-boyfriend Luke  is sniffing around Ichabod Crane despite being told to drop it. Orlando Jones calls the Center for Disease Control because the boy is exhibiting an odd illness. 

After a little debate, we determine that the The guy from the CDC is AGENT VICTOR HENDRIKSEN!!!!!!!! 

Middle English Boy is isolated in plastic (callback!), and Ichabod talks to the boy in Middle English.




Boy is from Roanoke.

This is the wonderful thing about watching this episode with fellow Supernatural fans. Not only did we identify Victor Hendriksen, but when Roanoke was mentioned, Katherine, Jason and I were all like, “CROATOAN!” and went into nerdy ecstasies about the CROATOAN virus.

Don’t judge.



Out in Purgatory, The Woods, Ichabod is great at tracking because he grew up fox hunting as an aristocrat. IS THERE NOTHING HE CAN’T DO??? Jesus.

Jason: Do you remember on Supernatural when they had the Croatoan virus and then it showed up years later as part of the Apocalypse? 

Me: Shut-up, you’re making me sad. 

Jason: Remember when Supernatural was really good?  Remember Chuck?


HIDDEN VILLAGE OF SICK PEOPLE that you find by walking on water.



So…The lost colony of Roanoke is hidden in the woods. They were cursed by the horseman Pestilence (wait, I thought there was no horseman called Pestilence?) but are protected in their special bubble by the spirit of the first colonist.

BUT DID THE GHOST ALSO MAKE THEM IMMORTAL???????? Why haven’t they aged???

OOOOOOOH, apparently Pesitlence is the fourth horseman because Pestilence is ALSO KNOWN as “Conquest.”

Katherine: Oh, cause germs conquer.



A bunch more people get sick with Black Veins Sickness.




Then Ichabod gets sick, so it’s KATRINA VISION TIME!!!! That can’t be the same actress as the first episode? Can it? They look so different. Still not over it.

Abbie’s Douche-y ex-boyfriend calls Oxford to check up on Ichabod and  apparently, someone has faked Ichabod’s records as a professor. I’m guessing “Secretly A WITCH” Orlando Jones.

Katrina is trapped in Purgatory! So the Forest IS purgatory!

Abbie goes to pray.


Okay, at this point I totally lose interest in what happens. Basically, Abbie takes (with Orlando Jones’ permission, because he now lets her do everything) Ichabod and the Middle English Boy to a pond in Roanoke and they are cured of Black Vein Sickness and the colony disappears and everyone gets better and SPECIAL AGENT VICTOR HENDRIKSON doesn’t have enough to do and I don’t really get it and I don’t really care. 

Me: I’m happy for you, Sleepy Hollow, and Imma let you finish, but Supernatural had the best Pestilence of all time. 

Jason: <High fives me>

Don’t judge. 



We end with hints at the Horseman of Death coming back. Ruh-row! 



In sum, I wasn’t as thrilled with episodes 2-5 (though we got some great Ichabod lines and I loved the sister stuff) …but when the show comes back we get JOHN NOBLE! 




Thus endeth the Binge Watching.